The Overthinking Challenge
einav avni 
For some people, overthinking has taken over their lives, taking over any last bit of energy left. Why is that, and what can they do, instead?
Remember Dottie from 'Dottie's Tip Of The Week'? Well, I took her out the day, and as soon as she finished doing her business and as I was fiddling around with her poo bag, she spotted a man walking his two dogs!!!
(I doubt she saw the man, but she certainly saw the dogs, and let me tell you, I don't exaggerate when I tell you that all hell broke loose!
Dottie bolted, throwing me onto the ground (poo bag in hand) and went on the attack as if she was sent, single-handedly to bring down the force of evil...
The man managed to grab Dottie and separate her from his little dogs, handing her over to me and my million apologies.
As I restrained her so she wouldn't attack the dogs again, I watched as the man walked past, praying Dottie would just let them all be. All of a sudden the man turned and said something, before continuing on his way.
Wait, what!!
I couldn't hear his words. I couldn't make out, from his facial expression if he was saying words of anger, wisdom, or just wishing me a better rest of the day.
I had no idea what amount of overthinking was required!!!
I decided he was wishing me a better day and continued on the quest of getting Dottie home, where no more viciousness was being dished out by this little wanna-be-monster!
But it got me thinking...
This man could have said anything, but the truth is that unless he was sharing some important advice, nothing he could have said would need to upset me or get me to overthink.
But the other truth is that we very often know that people shouldn't have this kind of power over us, yet we freely give our power and sanity away, even when these people never asked for it!
Here are THREE common fears, needs or habits that may cause overthinking:
1. The 'what if' loop
That's when, post-interaction, you can't stop running different scenarios to what was said or done. It's as if your brain just can't settle on a version of events that feels safe or that would result in the best outcome.
many fears can be associated with this loop - fear of rejection, need for protection, fear of the unknown, to name a few.
What to do?
Remember that it's only worth worrying over something you can actually change. If this event has already happened, the only thing to do is gain the appropriate lessons so that you can do things differently in the future. Try to bring in the trust that things always happen in the way they were meant to, so if you can't see the benefits of the situation, it means you are too close to it. Time will bring in the missing pieces you can't see today!
2. The curse of the hypervigilant person
One of the most common fears and negative conversations we have with ourselves is connected to the 'worst case scenario'. That's when we look at any event or interaction and analyse what's the worst that can happen because of that.
Sometimes, it's because we were being found, or someone told us off, or we had to do something that was totally out of our comfort zone, and now we don't know what to do or how to make it feel ok.
What to do?
Show up with curiosity. If you have a need for everything to be perfect and under control, and you now find yourself in uncharted territories, your natural reaction might be to overthink, over-analyse or over-worry. Curiosity will help remind you that it's not just about you and how you see the world, but rather, something you may perceive as not good enough might be the best for someone else. You are not living in SILO, and you shouldn't assume that just because it wasn't done to your highest standards, it's not good, safe or just fine...
3. The injustice predicament
This is when injustice has been served. Mostly, it was done to you, but of course, sometimes you may be agonising about something you did or said and now don't feel you can rectify, but this is more commonly known as guilt...
When you feel injustice was done, you will find yourself having endless conversations with yourself to try and show the other party that they were wrong and you were right. You'll bring arguments and supportive evidence, but ultimately, it will stay with you, because there is no point or possibility of airing it and putting the whole thing to bed.
What to do?
First of all, Yikes. It's really not fun, and because you can actually go nuts if you don't release the stress, here are two things I can recommend.
a) write it all down. A letter where you can write rims and rims of paper of all the history of these unfortunate events. Go to town on how you feel, how it's not fair, how you needed more support, love, understanding, chances, etc etc etc. Write everything down. Bring as many emotions out as you can. When you're completely done, burn the letter and don't ever let anyone have the chance of finding it. The next thing to do is write a second letter, to the same person where you write all the insights, wisdom and clarity that you now got because of that shitty situation. This can be a sentence, a paragraph or a page, just make sure you allow yourself to see it isn't all as bad as you believe. Now burn this second letter also.
b) park your ego and your need for justice and shine a big light onto you and what part of this was actually your doing. Not in a blamey way, but in a way that will help you see your own involvement too, and that will help you put all this turmoil to bed.
Remember that any interaction takes two sides to materialise. You've spent enough energy on polishing what the other side did, now it's time to look at you and bring some lessons into the mix...
(with love and kindness, mind!)
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This week, in Healing Conversations, I spoke with Valerie Hawkins about 'How nutrition can help heal chronic conditions' - a must watch for anyone wanting better quality gut and brain...
Today, we're diving deep into the intersection of nutrition, stress, and well-being with our distinguished guest, Valerie Hawkins. Valerie, a neuro-nutritionist, brings her unique insights into how our dietary choices impact chronic pain, anxiety, depression, and overall brain health.
In this episode, Valerie shares invaluable tips on tuning into your body through practices like maintaining a food and mood journal. She discusses the significance of gut health, the role of high-quality proteins, and the need to balance omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids to reduce inflammation. Valerie emphasises simple yet powerful changes in diet, which can significantly improve mental health by supporting neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine.
We explore the concept of the "three brains"—the brain in the head, heart, and gut—and their interconnected functions. Valerie explains how addressing both nutrition and stress is crucial for healing, and she shares success stories that highlight the profound impact of personalized dietary changes.
Whether you're dealing with chronic pain or anxiety or just looking to optimise your health, this episode is packed with practical advice and inspiration. So, grab your notepad and join us as we uncover the secrets to natural healing through nutrition and stress management. Don’t forget to share, ask questions, and engage with our conversation—your journey to healing starts now!
More about Valerie:
Valerie Hawkins is a dedicated nutritionist and self-concept coach specializing in helping women overcome anxiety, burnout, and overwhelm, along with related issues such as fatigue, weight gain, chronic pain and mood disorders so they can be happier and healthier. Drawing from her personal experience as a working mom, former engineer, and operator of multiple childcare centers, Valerie deeply understands the challenges of anxiety and burnout as well as dealing with migraines and fibromyalgia.
Valerie's transformative journey revealed the significant role nutrition plays in enhancing energy, mood, and mental health. She blends individualized nutrition plans with the Self-Concept Method to achieve rapid, tangible results. Her clients experience increased happiness, improved health, and renewed energy, ultimately leading to sustainable weight loss.
Valerie's expertise in nutrition, nutrigenomics, and self-concept coaching ensures easy-to-implement and lasting results for her clients. In her clinical practice, she is committed to using nutrition as a powerful tool for mental health improvement, weight and fatigue.
Social Links:
1) Freebie Happier in minutes podcast episode 2) https://www.hawkinshealthandwellness.com/julie
3) https://www.hawkinshealthandwellness.com/
4) https://www.facebook.com/valerie.hawkins.167527/
5) https://www.instagram.com/hawkinshealthandwellness/
6) https://www.linkedin.com/in/valerie-hawkins-4450b1216/
***
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You've recently seen me share two ways you can work with me in group settings, and I wanted to clarify the two offers:
1. A.M.E For Greatness project - Once a month, I, together with my brilliant colleagues Ann Smets and Dr Michelle Greenwell, run healing group meetings. For just £12 a month, you can be a part, too. (What's included? connections, meditations, movements, reflections, inspirations and more). To join - please send me a private message.
2. Healing From the Inside Out - this is a new 'drop-in' event, taking place twice a month, starting November 6th. In the first meeting, we will be talking about PROCRASTINATION and how to kick this habit once and for all. The meeting is 90 minutes long and will be recorded in case you can't show up. This retails at £20 per meeting. To book the November 6th meeting, please go to this link: https://buy.stripe.com/cN28yfgYrdru7rG7sI
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Dottie's Tip Of The Week
 | Someone said that 'the more you overthink, the less you'll understand' and I don't fully understand what this means, but I can tell you that for me, simple things are best. If I can do something about it, great, and if I can't, well, that's even better! HUMMANS always complicate everything, but I think that life is too short to spend on stuff you can't control! |
Best Client's Quote This Week
I've worked with people to help them heal all sorts of medical conditions - mostly ones the doctors couldn't find drug-free solutions for. Examples?
- Fibromyalgia
- Psoriasis
-Enlarged Prostate
- Cancer
- Colitis
- Chronic headaches /migraines
- Chronic back, neck shoulder pains
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To chat about your own conditions and how my methods can help, please book a chat using the link: https://calendly.com/einav-4/coaching-discovery-call
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